A New Dis Day
My dissertation committee has had some version of my dissertation for ten months. I have hounded them, badgered them, attempted to get them the most newest, most up-to-date drafts of my chapters, and have not heard a single fucking peep from these guys. Safe in the ivory tower of tenure, what the hell do they care that they're not doing there jobs. I don't even think that they think someone else is doing the job. I honestly just don't believe they give a shit.
Of course, this is holding up my life considerably, and when you live in Massachusetts, believe you me, you notice your life being held up. So, here's what I did. I emailed them to schedule a date for my defense. Simple.
Basically, I said something nice, but the unspoken message was that by mid-October, whether you've read it or not, I expect you to okay my dissertation and let me get the fuck out of here. My graduate coordinator who is totally clueless, then wrote to these people asking them the feasibility of my being ready to defend by that date.
Feasibility?! Holy shit! How are they supposed to speak to feasibility given that they haven't, aren't planning to, just plain won't read the fucking dissertation. My best hope of course is that their willingness to appear half-dead sloths was limited to their total unconcealed derision for their graduate students. In other words, that though they might be fine with appearing lazy assholes to me, they would afford the graduate director enough respect to lie and say, "oh yeah, aces. That guy's just plain ready." At which point, mid-October, they would show up to the defense and we'd sit around in silence unable to discuss a book that they hadn't read. BUT AT LEAST I WOULD GRADUATE!
No such luck, of course, the only reader to respond to her out of three basically told her that he'd never seen any of my work. True. I handed it to his secretary because he never shows up to his office hours, but when I cornered him in the hall last September he let me know that he had received the chapters. I took him at his word. By the way, my graduate director knows all about this and she just doesn't care. Their laziness, from her point of view, is my problem because she's just as lazy as they are.
So, the guy who has never seen my work because he expressly told me after he signed on for the project that he didn't have time to read the dissertation until it was finished may actually be fucking up my chance to get out of here. Thank you, scumbag!
Of course, this is holding up my life considerably, and when you live in Massachusetts, believe you me, you notice your life being held up. So, here's what I did. I emailed them to schedule a date for my defense. Simple.
Basically, I said something nice, but the unspoken message was that by mid-October, whether you've read it or not, I expect you to okay my dissertation and let me get the fuck out of here. My graduate coordinator who is totally clueless, then wrote to these people asking them the feasibility of my being ready to defend by that date.
Feasibility?! Holy shit! How are they supposed to speak to feasibility given that they haven't, aren't planning to, just plain won't read the fucking dissertation. My best hope of course is that their willingness to appear half-dead sloths was limited to their total unconcealed derision for their graduate students. In other words, that though they might be fine with appearing lazy assholes to me, they would afford the graduate director enough respect to lie and say, "oh yeah, aces. That guy's just plain ready." At which point, mid-October, they would show up to the defense and we'd sit around in silence unable to discuss a book that they hadn't read. BUT AT LEAST I WOULD GRADUATE!
No such luck, of course, the only reader to respond to her out of three basically told her that he'd never seen any of my work. True. I handed it to his secretary because he never shows up to his office hours, but when I cornered him in the hall last September he let me know that he had received the chapters. I took him at his word. By the way, my graduate director knows all about this and she just doesn't care. Their laziness, from her point of view, is my problem because she's just as lazy as they are.
So, the guy who has never seen my work because he expressly told me after he signed on for the project that he didn't have time to read the dissertation until it was finished may actually be fucking up my chance to get out of here. Thank you, scumbag!
posted by Monstro D. Whale at
10:09 AM
1 Comments:
Well, clearly you must email the entire dissertation to the scumbag and tell him that it is done and here it is. Then it's in his face and he has to do something about it. I suggest you become more confrontational with the committee if they aren't being at all helpful. They are, after all, your committee and subject to your direction. I've heard that in order to get a Grad comm involved, you have to somehow get them interested in what you're doing. Arrange a meeting over coffee (which you'll provide) at an upscale joint, show up with smiles and none of the negativity haunting your thoughts about how horrible they've been, and let rip with a succinct summary (a summary of epicly minor proportions). Keep it short and then request information on why they've been delaying, and what you can do to help them to help you. Because, you're going to have to take the stance that whatever problems they are having are entirely your fault, probably.
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