Whudda W.A.S.T.E.

"Tell them I said something important. You're supposed to say something important when you die." Last Words of Poncho Villa

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Name: Monstro
Location: Northampton, Massachusetts, US

"Behind the intials was a metaphor, a delirium tremens, a trembling unfurrowing of the mind's plowshare. The saint whose water can light lamps, the clairovoyant whose lapse in recall is the breath of God, the true paranoid for whom all is organized in spheres joyful or threatening about the central pulse of himself, the dreamer whose puns probe ancient fetid shafts and tunnels of truth all act in the same special relevance to the word, or whatever it is the word is there, buffering, to protect us from." Pynchon, The Crying of Lot 49

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Q and A with Financial Aid

Q: So here's my application for Summer aid, is this okay?
A: Yep.
Q: Do I need anything else?
A: Oh, yeah (note: had I not asked this question I would not have had a complete file and would not receive my money). You need a note from your chair saying that you will be engaged in your work this Summer and you need your taxes.

...a few days later.
Q: So here's my letter from my chair, will this work?
A: Nope, this has to go to the Graduate Dean's office.

...a few days later.
Q: So, you have a copy of my taxes and the graduate dean's office has that letter, am I all set?
A: Yep.

(pause for incredulity)

Q: So, I've done everything to get my money.
A: Yep.

(pause again)

Q: When will I get the money?
A: Well, disbursement doesn't okay until the beginnning of June.
Q: So, beginning of June?
A: No. The first cycle begins the beginning of July?
Q: So, beginning of July?
A: Yes, for the first cycle.

(I nearly walk out and then...)

Q: Am I in the first cycle?
A: Hmmm.... (she doesn't know and there is no one in the world who does). I think you've made the deadline.
Q: Well, when is the deadline?
A: I believe it's in June.
Q: So, after the cycle has been okayed?
A: Yes (which is by the way, impossible).
Q: Let's say I miss the first cycle, how long before I get the money?
A: First of August.

Let's sum up. I will get my check about a month after my last paycheck and probably a week after rent is due. And if I don't get the check then, I will have to wait a month. This money is by the way a loan, and any bank in the world could okay the same size loan in a matter of days. I think I will be getting the money in July, but as the deadline for such money is actually after the point when decisions are made about this money, there can be no telling for sure (unless Financial Aid is in possession of a time machine-- in which case, all this makes perfect sense). My only hope is that I will get the money for the Summer in the Summer because that would be nice...you know...not starving and all.

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