Dr. Feelbad part 3
But here folks, HERE, is what really irks me. You see, hypno-therapy is the best I can do. That's it. That's what the fucking medical profession and all those goddamned doctors have come up with.
"You shouldn't smoke."
"Cool, how do I quit."
"I'm sorry son, nobody has done a lick of research on the subject of actually quitting smoking."
There's some anti-depressant stuff that turns out to accidentally have the side effect of controlling nicotine cravings, but no one is taking my $700 taxes a year (me alone), and plugging it into the "let's help these addicts kick" fund, and I don't want to start playing with my brain chemistry. No instead, I've got to sit with a therapist and explain to her my multiple dealings with my alcoholic brother, so that she can feel comfortable performing what is essentially a parlor trick.
God, I hate doctors!
"You shouldn't smoke."
"Cool, how do I quit."
"I'm sorry son, nobody has done a lick of research on the subject of actually quitting smoking."
There's some anti-depressant stuff that turns out to accidentally have the side effect of controlling nicotine cravings, but no one is taking my $700 taxes a year (me alone), and plugging it into the "let's help these addicts kick" fund, and I don't want to start playing with my brain chemistry. No instead, I've got to sit with a therapist and explain to her my multiple dealings with my alcoholic brother, so that she can feel comfortable performing what is essentially a parlor trick.
God, I hate doctors!
posted by Monstro D. Whale at
2:52 PM
4 Comments:
Well, if it makes you feel any better, the person who asked you all those questions probably isn't a doctor, but rather someone studying for a Masters in Clinical Social Work.
Not like that helps...
You know what will help you quit, man? The Truth.
Yeah, I said it: The Truth.
You know what's strange? The Truth commercials are actually funded by tobacco money. In other words, the tobacco companies are making anti-smoking commercials to get you to quit smoking, except that the commercials seem to be constructed by self important assholes who you kind of want to see get their asses kicked. In other words, the commerical is anti-smoking, but it's also anti-"people who act all self righteous about them not wanting you to smoke."
Fuck the truth. We know the truth. Watch George Plympton's
"25 Ways to Quit Smoking;" at least that's funny. Carrying around a tobacco beetle has always been my favorite.
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