Dave's not here

Well, it has been what...a long time since my previous blog, which wasn't nearly as head scratching cool as I'd hoped it would be.  Blogging, for those of you who do not know is much like any other thing that you hope to do once a day and end up only doing twice a month.  There's this thought like if you'd only make it a habit, you wouldn't have to think of something to say. But you're just too damned lazy to make it a habit. 
It isn't like I hadn't thought of things to say.  It's just that when I do, I'm no where near my computer.  And then when I get near my computer, I'm too busy checking my e-mail.  Inevitably, someone will have sent me an e-mail, I'll reply by telling them my strange observation, and then I don't feel like writing it again, so I don't blog.  There's this feeling like if you're going to blog, it really ought to be something important.  However, I've very few observations to make and as such can only say this...
It's good to not be unemployed.  Many of you will probably already know that I worked in a woodshop sanding funeral urns.  Does that sound like fun?  Well, it was actually less fun than that.  Sanding urns is a job that requires the bare minimum of mental activity, which brings us to Dave.  Now, I want to clarify.  Some of you will hear mention of Dave and wonder who, or what, I am talking about.  I do believe that the easiest way to demonstrate Dave is to give a quick lesson in Dave-bonics.  Here goes:
Eimsteim- that scientist guy who thinks he's so smart.
Corporate-  person responsable for a crime.  In English, "culprit"
Deheaded-  to lose one's head literally
Molestators-  someone who touches a child.  There is no direct translation of this word into commen English.  I suppose what Dave is going for here is molester, but then there is no comprehension of the ultimate cunnundrum for Dave:  "if I hug my kid, does that make me a child molestator?"
Irabians-  Catch all term for people of the middle East.
Now that we have that under our belt, we might better understand a simple question of Dave's:  "Why should child molestators be deheaded I mean you don't have to be Eimsteim to know that we're all children of God and so we're all corporates."  True dat.
I will miss Dave and his enlightening conversations about how we never went to the moon and how he'd shoot everyone who owns guns.  
Luckilly I have found something new to keep me occupied, as has Max (I can hear him right now), and that's called moving.  Many people think that Chico is the hottest place on Earth, but that's only partly true, because clearly my garage is part of Chico, but I don't think any spot in town is as hot as my garage, but still I press on, packing away things that were packed away a year ago, but who's boxes have since caved.  Think of me, folks, as you stand 'neath the air conditioning sipping water.  
Still could be worse, I suppose.  I could be listening to stories of giant chickens living in North Carolina and how a holes a hole.  Ah, the pearls of wisdom I will miss.